I hope that you got to see the full moon last night. It was the second one this month and therefore called a blue moon. It happens every two to three years due to our calendar not being in sync with the way the earth and moon work.
Something more rare than a blue moon happened yesterday too. Robyn and I observed the 30th anniversary of our wedding. I cooked (another rare event) ribs, cornbread, slaw, potatoes and bought a cake. Our family gathered around the table and talked and generally had a good time. We sat outside and relaxed and a few friends came over to help us finish the cake and congratulate us.
What have I learned in 30 years? Probably not as much as I would like to think. But the things I already knew have been proved by experience.
Here are a few random lessons:
- Marriage takes work – If I heard that once, I heard it a hundred times. Planning the wedding is child’s play compared to making a marriage. If I could pass on any advice to the unmarried it would be spend your time planning a marriage, not a wedding. (IMHO Modern day weddings are the combination of misunderstood traditions and greedy marketing.)
- Marriage require trust – I’m not talking about the kind where you count on your spouse to pick up the dry-cleaning (although that is helpful). I mean that you know without a doubt that when you fail, your spouse will still be there and will still love you.
- Marriage requires love – This needs to be first, last and everywhere in between. Not just the gushy, fuzzy kind of feelings that the uninitiated think about, but love that never fails, always patient, keeps no record of wrong … (read 1 Corinthians 13). Without love, all of the work and planning in the world won’t be enough. Love makes us do what we naturally will not do: put the needs of the other ahead of our self.
I have probably learned a few other things in the past 30 years, but those are the front of my list this morning. These years with Robyn have shown me what a marriage can be and how love can continue to grow. I have to give God and Robyn all of the credit for these lessons.